Looking inside, looking ahead

What a time this is / has been
Of being stripped of all pretenses
Of facing all the lurking monsters
Of melting down
Of near-panic and withdrawing into a shell
Of denying life by denying death
Of seeking comfort, stability, security in the world outside
When the real answer lies deep inside

No such thing as (dis)comfort, (in)security, (in)stability
Games, our memories and our thoughts play
Realising the magnitude of the challenge,
The knees buckle, the heart nearly gives up,
The brain freezes over, the “not good enough” voices take over

AND THEN
A light begins to reach the closed eyes
Like a bud opening to the “risk” of flowering
Freely giving what it has – no comparisons, no hesitation

Conditioning -- what strengthens it is our own thinking
What a perfect, a nearly perfect trap
No escape from self
Only Love, to melt away
The encrustation of eons

Divine, sublime – at one level mere ideas for the mind
And yet the very substance of life
Mystery has to be revealed,

not explained and not understood

Trust we don’t, strut we do
All it leads to is a rusty us
Worn out, fragile,
Always seeking to look good

rather than be good and do good

Ah! The alchemy of life
To take matter and make it breathe and grow
To self-organise!

Words always point but stop well short of the ultimate
How else can it be?

Magic, love, flow, creation
Shadow, fears, stuck, desperation
What a dance!
Heart wrenching, exhausting, too much to handle!

But then wise men say, you invite challenges for your own growth
And God never gives you anything you can’t handle

So there
Dare to LOVE
Live On Vital Energy!